Our Future Scientists
The following are all quotes collected from the science exams of elementary school students:
- Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water.
- Some oxygen molecules help fires burn while others help make water, so sometimes it's brother against brother.
- Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it is not found in a free state.
- When you breath, you inspire. When you do not breath, you expire.
- Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire.
- The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects.
- The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
- Vacuums are nothings. We only mention them to let them know we know they're there.
- Vacuum: A large, empty space where the pope lives.
- Magnet: Something you find crawling all over a dead cat.
- Water freezes at 32 degrees and boils at 212 degrees. There are 180 degrees between freezing and boiling because there are 180 degrees between north and south.
- A vibration is a motion that cannot make up its mind which way it wants to go.
- Many dead animals in the past changed to fossils while others preferred to be oil.
- We say the cause of perfume disappearing is evaporation. Evaporation gets blamed for a lot of things people forget to put the top on.
- To most people solutions mean finding the answers. But to chemists solutions are things that are still all mixed up.
- I am not sure how clouds get formed. But the clouds know how to do it, and that is the important thing.